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17 April 2011 @ 03:29 am
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TITS DICKS SEX SHIT FUCK LOTS OF PORNOGRAPHY HERE

Do I have your fucking attention yet? Good. No, this ain't a motherfucking porn post, you sick fucks, this is something a good goddamn more important. I'm posting this shit from a huge fucking mainframe engine we 'liberated' from a bunch of terrorist fuckheads. I'm still breaking through the encyption on this motherfucker, but what I've got decoded so far is a Big Fucking Deal. End-Of-The-World Big Fucking Deal. You are all gonna want to hear this shit, so listen closely.

I'll be updating this post with recordings as I get them unpacked, just check the comments, and spread the motherfucking word to anyone who'll listen. We need as many people knowing about this shit as we can fucking well get.
 
 
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
tidesnpc on April 17th, 2011 07:32 am (UTC)
VOICE
[An elderly man's voice:] "I'm very sorry to bother you, Maestro Delphine."

[A smooth women's voice responds, filled with a warm smile] "By no means, Professor. My door is always open for you."

"Yes, of course. It's about the blasting project."

"What about it? I trust that it's not falling behind schedule."

"No, no, everything's proceeding as planned. That's the problem, actually. I've been running these numbers and I think there's a good chance that blasting at the depths needed to reach the Ymir will reactivate the Badlands fault line!"

"The fault line?"

"Yes! And with the amount of energy we're pouring into it, the results could be catastrophic! The whole continent could be split right in half!"

"And what do you recommend we do, Professor?"

"We have to abort the operation. There's no other way to be sure."

[A pause before the woman responds]

"I see. Thank you for coming to me with this, Professor."

"I had to, once I saw the figures. If you want, I can go over them with you..."

"That won't be necessary. I trust your judgment."

[Another pause, before the woman speaks again in a soft tone]

"Such thorough work deserves its reward, Professor. Here, take this."

"Your...your ring, Maestro? I'm really not worthy--"

"Go ahead," [the woman replies, her voice rising to a pleasant lilt] "Consider it a sign of my gratitude."

"If...if you insist." [A fumbling pause, the sound of a ring being removed from a finger, and slid onto another] "Thank you, Maestro. It fits perfectly."

[The woman sounds amused] "It does, doesn't it?"

"And you'll abort the blasting operation, then?"

"Of course not."

"No!? But you can't just--" [A hum begins to rise in the background, increasing in volume until it is nearly deafening] "What's happening? I--aaaah!"

[His wordless scream is mercifully short, and a moment later the sound of a small metal object - a ring, perhaps - hitting the ground and bouncing can be heard]

"What a silly man," [the woman's voice says, voice filled with a chilling mirth] "As if there was ever any other way to free Ymir from its prison. Not that it matters. Ymir is a much more enticing toy than this tiny continent."
tidesnpc on April 17th, 2011 07:33 am (UTC)
VOICE
General, I have been your loyal subordinate as always, but my patience has finally worn thin! In case you haven't noticed, this organization is in complete tatters. We haven't gotten any clear orders from the Maestro in months, and when we do, they're always at odds with those of her subordinates! And lord knows what those Philosophers and their pet monsters are up to anymore - if I may speak frankly, our alliance with them was a mistake from the start. I'm trying my best to keep our men and women in line, but if our organization splinters anymore, I'm afraid there's nothing we cannot do.
tidesnpc on April 17th, 2011 07:34 am (UTC)
VOICE
"Hey, uh, so what's gonna happen when we dig up this Ya-meer thing?"

"Ymir."

"S'what I said. Ya-meer. So what's gonna happen?"

"Beats me."

"Man, this isn't what I signed up for. Back then, we were bombing ships for Lunasa, shipping weapons, and tricking schmucks into bombing the government for us."

"I remember. I thought we were going to change things. In a good way."

"Y'know what I heard? That the continent could break in two when we dig up that Ya-meer."

"Yeah. I don't like it."

"I joined this organization because I needed the money. No one told me we were going to destroy the world!"

"My family is in the Badlands. If the continent splits, what will happen to my wife? My daughter? You saw what happened to Hegua!"

"So what do we do about it?"

"...Nothing. We're powerless."
tidesnpc on April 17th, 2011 07:36 am (UTC)
VOICE
[First, there is a man’s voice. He sounds astonishingly middle-aged, with a somewhat posh accent]

“So, if what you’re telling me is correct, just about all of our allies are seeking to destroy the continent.”

[There is another man’s voice. He sounds much younger than the first man, and his tone is serious, albeit somewhat smug]

“I’ve confirmed that both Maestro Delphine and Mr. World have their sights on Ymir, sir. I don’t have complete information on how they intend to obtain it, although I have gleaned that releasing it without destroying the continent would be almost impossible.”

[There is a sound of a fist slamming on the table, and then the posh middle-aged voice speaks again:]

“Damn them both! We need this continent! After all the hard work we put into turning Ivona and Vohemar against each other… how are we supposed to profit from its destruction?”

[There is a pause. The man resumes after that pause]

“Well, I suppose this means we’ll be contacting that crew. I believe that Wrath’s already on his way there-“

“I’m afraid there’s bad news on that front as well, sir. I’ve gotten some intelligence that their leader doesn’t have The Philosophers’ best interests at heart.”

“Nonsense. At the very least, we created Wrath, he clearly owes u-“

“He seems to be answering to a higher power than you at the moment. Perhaps you should be more careful about your experiments, sir.”

[There is a swishing sound…]

“ADAM, what the hell are you-“

[The click of a gun]

“It seems as though quite a few of them are answering to higher powers these days.”

[And then the sound of a gunshot]
tidesnpc on April 17th, 2011 07:37 am (UTC)
Little note from the hacker on this one: It doesn't mean much on its own, but it's from a cell of these fuckers in the Badlands. It sure as hell sounds bad.
tidesnpc on April 17th, 2011 07:38 am (UTC)
VOICE
Hello…? Hello!? Is anyone getting this? Please, let someone be listening…

If anyone is hearing this, then please help us--everything is going to hell. I don’t know what the hell is going on, but I do know we’re in serious danger…



The hell is that…?!



BRING BIG GUNS, ALRIGHT!?
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